Today’s comic was inspired by a particularly pathetic tale of a tattoo artist and his customer, neither of whom could spell a common word. The customer made the mistake in his proffered design and the tattoo guy failed to recognize this while he inked the typo into the poor sap’s arm. I would advise both parties to exercise a little more care in the future. This is why I beat my hide-stretched drum.

Earlier this week I got confused by the fact that two different BBC Radio programs were attempting to schedule interviews with me simultaneously. Eventually I sorted out the fact that one of them was a language program called Word of Mouth. According to my co-interviewee, Bethany of the excellent “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks, which I have long had a link to in my roll de blog, this particular episode will be airing on August 5, and hopefully it will be available on the Interweb shortly after.

Attend this TV appearance of the Grammar Girl, if you will. You don’t have to watch the whole thing; really, I’d just like to direct your attention to the introduction and initial few lines that the news anchors exchange with her. Note how glibly the anchors attribute the erosion of spelling to computers and texting and the like. I recall that the Today Show folks said much the same thing when introducing their TEAL piece. This is a curious line of reasoning, no less so because it seems reflexive. I think it taps into a fear of the new, of technological advancement, that has existed in many guises through the centuries.

In any case, a new book by David Crystal (reviewed here and here) looks at texting and finds that it is in fact not culpable for the decline of civilization.

A comic, for your consumption. Clearly I have fallen out of practice in the realm of drawing, as is evidenced by the misshapen limbs of my personages. Behold, a ripe target for the foul humours of your ridicule. Perhaps in future comics you will witness the gradual recapturing of my artistic skills, or at least an attainment of the grace to avoid portraying challenging poses, such as walking.

This is only tangentially related to our interest, but it serves as a reassuring reminder that American journalism is not faring any worse than its overseas counterparts. Plus there is someone in the article named Mr. Balls.

Also, if anyone has knowledge of a less awkward method of presenting a comic through WordPress, please let me know. A full-size presentation of the image within the blog proper does not seem to be an option.

The League has also lately inspired folks in a very different quarter (quartier?). A professor wrote to tell me of the concept of a “grammar safari” now being incorporated into a course at Florida Gulf Coast University, and shared the links to two videos being used to promote the class. If any FGCU students lurk among this readership, don’t forget to sign up for CRN 81706 with the Registrar.

To round off the day’s distractions, a final recommendation. We could do worse than to follow the philosophy outlined by Michael Quinion in this recent episode of the Minnesota Public Radio Grammar Grater show, regarding the use of “preventative” versus “preventive.” There is an mp3 of the show, and a text summary for the aurally impatient. I think Quinion’s careful analysis speaks pretty closely to what we at TEAL believe about similar orthographic issues. Any strongly felt dogma should be traced back to its origins.

I believe I know now the direction that this modest site should take to keep its mission vibrant, and I will be working to steer our worn boots upon that shining path. Until then, fix a gimlet eye on the grammatical calumnies that taint your streets, and be wary.

However, I’d still enjoy seeing more reader submissions of typos both found and fixed. I will post them in this blog with due credit. The contest is over, of course, so no material prize awaits our typo hunters, but I hope that the quite immaterial reward of improving a small corner of the nation’s lingual landscape will appeal just as much. Let us build our corrective nation. I must mention, however, that you’ll have to have gotten permission for your correction. Otherwise the long arm of the law may swat us both. This is a slight change in policy brought about by necessity.

Last Monday I made an appearance on Boston’s Fox news station (technically in Dedham). I was going to mention on-air that I needed a job, but what came out instead was that I have no money, which, while also true, was less enlightening than my original intended statement. Otherwise the appearance went well. My mom has a copy, if you’re interested.

The first telling detail one may notice is that I do not shave as often as I once did. Most days I thoroughly resemble a man of the alleys. One may conclude that I have not been experiencing many formal or semi-formal occasions as of late, the kind that would require a closer-groomed appearance. This category of human affairs is not limited to but does include regular employment. The consequences of lacking such, i.e., no longer having money, can similarly observed on the top of my head, currently billowing out in an unsightly pouf. Today I got an e-mail from a national newsmagazine, and yet I do not seem to be able to afford a haircut. There is a strange disconnect here. Apparently fame and fortune do not always gambol hand-in-hand.

Observe, too, the blisters on my feet, perhaps caused by recently wearing dress shoes that no longer fit. This could be a hopeful indicator. Perhaps the razor will soon be taken up again on a regular basis, and clownish locks will be shorn at the barbershop on Mass. Ave. It is too early to tell. O cherished reader, there is much more I could tell you, about the wherefore behind finances abruptly becoming so dire, and opportunities gleaming as the proverbial mirage on the stark sands of the near future. But it’ll have to wait.

I was reading a Wired article this morning that struck me as interesting. Is our vaunted language destined to become the next Latin? This is another good reason not to chasten ESL speakers for their typos– maybe they are crafting their own interesting and someday equally valid brand of English.

I gave them a worksheet that included a sign encompassing the most common errors in America (per the data we collected on the trip), and challenged them to hunt all of the typos down. Everybody did very well in pointing out the bugaboos.  I also advised them on creating Typo Correction Kits and tips for typo hunters.

After our discussion, they gave me this fine toiletry kit embossed with the initials of my– our– organization.

They gave me hope for the future of spelling and grammar and whatnot.  After seeing their enthusiasm, I am convinced that we need to make up some sort of official TEAL educational material.

The name substitutions were bad enough, but note the culpable guy’s reaction. “It happens all the time,” says he. This kind of dismissiveness may strike a familiar note to cherished readers of the Typo Hunt Across America. Everybody makes mistakes, he says, the subtext being So who gives a crap? Well, the poor suckers who were expecting a quality product to commemorate their high-school years, that’s who. I highly doubt that the “free stickers” the publishers are providing to cover over their errors will be sufficient redress. Why not do the decent thing and produce a new print run?

I thought I had seen enough of the country to blacken my heart with the protective burnt crust of cynicism, and yet stories like this still somehow lance through and surprise me with their senseless villainy. Maybe I am an eternal naïf, asking why over and over when I should already know the answer by now.

Anyway, don’t lean on that spell-check.  Not just because of the danger described herein, but also because it doesn’t catch homophones.  Ewe no eye em write, to!

Will this guy kill me if I tell him that he spelled “potatoes” wrong? No, he is not allowed to under federal law. He may give you a dirty look. He may make an unsubtle effort to get you to leave the store. But chances are you will remain free from bodily harm. Just assess the neighborhood and the setting carefully first. Much like hiking or lake-swimming, typo-hunting is best enjoyed under the buddy system.

Is this an establishment run by those speaking English as their second language? If the typos are heaped upon one another in an obvious fashion, that’s a good clue. Sometimes you don’t realize it until you’re halfway through an awkward encounter with the proprietor. When in doubt, give the folks a pass– you can find plenty of other stuff around the neighborhood in need of fixing. Remember, you’d probably sound pretty clumsy in their home tongue.

Am I going to be bothering that cashier? Some store or restaurant (or whatever) employees are pretty busy all the time, so there’s a chance that they won’t slow down just to let you insert an apostrophe into one of their signs. You never know, though, until you ask. You might be surprised at who expresses gratitude at being able to improve the public presentation of their business.

Could I get in trouble if I fixed the mistake on my own? If you’re smart about it, you’ll be okay. Again, having a buddy along is helpful, for running interference or keeping watch while you work. Make it look as pretty/consistent as you can. You should only really correct something without asking if there’s no one around to ask or you can predict that the response would be tepid. I would recommend staying away from state- or federal-owned property, though… trust me on this one.  Yes, you could.  Very much so.  Don’t do it!

Who am I to point out somebody else’s mistake? You’re a person just trying to be helpful, that’s who. The store or other organization has put the sign out for the public to see. That means it is fair game. As long as you’re courteous and maybe a little self-effacing when you mention the typo and ask if you can fix it, nobody can rightfully accuse you of being a dick. This is not the same as ragging on someone’s spelling in an e-mail or pronunciation of a word in conversation; this is making an attempt to improve a piece of public communication.

How do I even bring the typo up? It’s best to jump right into the matter after greetings have been exchanged. You don’t want to lead the employees into thinking that you’re actually going to buy into the service they’re offering, lest they be disappointed when you bring up your true purpose. Feel free to mention the League if you think it’ll help; they might have even heard of it. Just be nice and lean on the fact that you are trying to help out (and that everybody makes mistakes).

That’s all I’ve got for now. Courage, dear Leaguers.

NY Times

New Hampshire Public Radio

Buffalo News

That last, by the way, is not a periodical of current events exclusively pertaining to buffaloes. Were such a publication to exist, though, the little buffalo that I got Jane in a shop by the Continental Divide would finally have something to read about his people. Buffaloie did enjoy a glimpse of his brethren as we passed them in Montana, though.